What to talk about on 1st dates?

So, you’ve taken the first step by setting up or agreeing to a date. Leading up to meeting up, it is exciting and scary at the same time. After all, you will be sharing a drink or perhaps a meal with someone new – what will you talk about during?

The goal of dates is to show the best of yourself. There is a fine line between talking too much and talking too little. Conversation topics that you should discuss would be things that are trivial enough to be polite and yet interesting to you both. It is easier than it sounds.

 GOOD TOPICS

Travel

With budget travel so readily available and work hours increasing, try talking about travelling – almost everyone goes someone. One study states that 58% of all Brits will travel abroad in summer.

 

Do you like travelling? When was the last time you travelled? Where did you go? Where is your favorite destination? Where is your dream destination?

 

Food

Some people eat to live, while others live to eat – regardless which one you are, everyone eats. So definitely talk about food – future dates can be set accordingly. The same can be applied when you meet for drinks – be it alcoholic or not, coffee or tea and more.

 

What is your favorite cuisine? Which is your favorite restaurant / food stall? Do you cook? What is your drink of choice? Which is your favourite bar?

 

Interests

Find out what you both like to do in your spare time. Share your interests and hobbies so that if there is a follow-on date, you may experience something together. You may not have to agree on everything (and that’s okay) but at least you find out more about each other.

 

What do you like to do in your off-time? How do you spend your weekend? Tell me about your perfect day. Do you like (enter activity)?

 

Relationship goals

It may be a bit heavy at the start of the date but it is essential. Get a grip on whether there is potential in this or not. Everyone is busy nowadays – the nice thing to do is to not waste each other’s time.

 

Are you looking for a relationship or just friends?

BAD TOPICS

Beyond what you should talk about, there are also plenty of things that you not talk about, yet. Here are some subjects that will definitely antagonise your date.

 

Religion and Politics 

In the first few dates, it is best to steer clear of religion and politics. These are sensitive topics that are easy to rub people the wrong way. While it may matter in a serious relationship, try to keep it light at the start.

 

Health conditions

Casual conversations are not insurance policies, it shouldn’t cover major illnesses and disabilities. While it may be very honest, it may make your date uncomfortable.

 

Exes

Don’t dwell on previous relationships – if you are out meeting new people, you’re moving on. Bringing it up may show that you are not still lingering emotionally on the past.

 

Work

While it is perfectly fine to talk about what is your career, it shouldn’t be a seminar on your industry. Give only a brief introduction, as this is not an interview. If you are not in a job currently, say you are transitioning between posts or upgrading for the next progression.

 

Overly focused on your children

If you have children, you should mention that you have and love them. Though, constant regaling about their achievements isn’t recommended. Too much time spent on talking about your children shows that you are unlikely to have time in the future for your date.

Nobody wants to spend time with a person who babbles about everything or someone who is so quiet that the awkward silence is deafening. So it is always good to prepare some conversation topics while avoiding others ahead of time to ensure a good date.

 

3 online to offline dating safety tips

Online dating is all the rage these days. And it is hard to deny its popularity – never before is it possible to “meet” hundreds of thousands of people from the comfort of one’s home/office/car/etc.

Behind a monitor or a smartphone, it is easy to be bold, funny and outgoing. In person, where the real connection happens, plenty of variables are bound to happen. There is plenty of advice on how to make sure a first date goes well, here are some tips on keeping it safe.

 

Tip 1: Share your whereabouts

Share your geo-location, always let a trusted friend know where and when this date will be. He or she will be able to check in on you to know you are doing well. After all, you will be talking about the date anyway afterwards – might as well make it a safety measure too.

 

Another thing you can do is to get the same friend to call in the middle of the date. On one hand, if the date isn’t going as planned, it is a chance to bail out of the date – a work emergency is always a good excuse. If the date is proceeding well, you can always answer that “I’m busy and work will have to wait.” This will always score brownie points with your date.

 

Tip 2: Meet in a public place

By choosing the date venue, it reveals much about your personality and interests. Be it a cafe, bar, pub, restaurant or any other spot, always make sure it is a public place. Two reasons for this – first, with some people around you, there is less silence/pressure on the date. Second, plenty of other patrons around can ensure that civility is maintained.

 

If your date chooses a venue that you’ve never been, you can always make a site visit prior to scout it out. At any time, that you aren’t keen on the location, you should ask to switch. If possible, suggest a venue that you’ve been to before so the familiarity makes you more comfortable. An excuse could be that there is a drink or dish that your date must definitely try there.

 

Tip 3: Two drinks maximum

As an icebreaker and part of proper etiquette, dates usually start with drinks. To break the awkwardness, alcohol eases the stress. Also, your drink choice tells a lot about who you are – it often is a conversation starter. Whatever the drink (especially an alcoholic one), keep it to a maximum of two drinks.

 

Alcohol’s other side effect is impaired judgement. Having too many may result in saying the wrong things and even getting taken advantage of. Two drinks is also a polite amount of time that you should spend on a first date. It prevents leaving too early and over-lingering.

So, after swiping through a ton of profiles online, chatting with a selected few, you’ve decided to meet up in person with one of them in person. This is an important step as it is time to make this date, well, real. Since you will be meeting a stranger for the first time – so you will be really putting yourself out there emotionally and physically.

To ensure that taking the leap of faith pays off, be mindful of these tips to keep you happy and secure.

 

Meet Drinks venue review: 3 Bistro

Nestled conveniently at Marina Square, I was greeted by Jon Lukas from 3 Bistro, a spacious restaurant that boasts a robust selection of wines and spirits made to match the menu. The venue’s decor had a fun, versatile vibe.

I was given the 3 Bistro Tiger Prawn Aglio Olio along with a glass of Santa Alicia Cabernet Sauvignon from Chile by Jon’s recommendation to accentuate the point.

 

First, the pasta is first blanched in water, olive oil and a thick prawn stock before ending with a quick stir fry, resulting in a texture I can best describe as “al dente plus”. Firm but chewy with a hint of crunch.

 

Small cut chilly and light touch of finely chopped roasted garlic enhances the pasta, already imbued with flavourful prawn essence before it had graced the plate.

 

A generous serving of fresh tiger prawns adorned the presentation, the red succulent stars of the dish. Fresh seafood doesn’t need much to be done to it to bring out the taste, the shell came off easily with none of the meaty bounty getting stuck. Overall juicy and cooked well.

The glass of cabernet sauvignon was a young vintage and it complemented the meal with its light fruity body, the long nose of the wine held flavours of blackberry and plums, a nose that delivered a matching taste to tantalise my waiting palate. The playfulness in the light acidity to match the vintage pulls the fine oak overtone finish to a consistent aftertaste, making sure that with and between each bite of my aglio olio, my taste buds were never left idle long after the flavour of prawn and roasted garlic had all but disappeared.

 

I saved the last two sips of my wine for the chocolate lava cake served with Vanilla ice cream topped with sunflower seeds and chocolate syrup. I’ll leave it to your imagination to linger on the sinfulness of the dessert.

“We want to use the food as a bridge for the couples to connect” mentions Jon, and 3 Bistro sports a good space for you to get to know your date at your own pace through the night. Whether over a younger vintage for casual drinking, or an older, stronger wine, for the conversations late through the night that sparks something new.

Use MeetDrinks to meet someone new today for a drink at 3Bistro- located at 6 Raffles Blvd, Singapore 039594

 

Holiday season first dates

As they say, it’s the most wonderful time of the year. The festive season of Christmas and New Years sees more people taking it easy from work – spending more time out merry making. Traditionally, as the weather gets cooler /colder, everyone’s hearts warm up more – meaning it is a great time for meeting new people.

So after you’ve found someone interesting for a date, here are some reminders as you step out of the office or your home.

 

Do not go to places that plays holiday music

It may be unavoidable but keep this to a minimum. Malls and cheesy bars tend to blare such music to encourage purchases. First dates can sometimes be awkward so the last thing you want is to spend your time humming the infectious “Jingle Bells” or “Au Lang Sye”.

Such places also tend to attract a family crowd. Screaming kids running around plus old people wearing tacky sweaters are extreme distractions when you should be paying attention to each other. If necessary, call ahead to the venue to enquire about their music selection.

 

Do not order the holiday special

In every restaurant, there is bound to be Christmas special meal for two. It is more expensive, have limited options and more food than needed for the date. It is always good to give your date a choice over her meal options. Also, not having to stuff it all down means there is more room for conversation.

Likewise, there will be a themed drink at the bar. Why shouldn’t you try it out? It is gimmick and unless there is mixologist on hand, it will likely look/taste interesting but not in a good way. Instead, order what you would usually have and let your date do the same. Your drink choices reveal much about yourself and it can be an interesting topic to connect on.

 

Do talk about the past and the future

As the year winds down, it is a good time to reflect. Talking about the highlights and lowlights of 2015 and the choices can reveal plenty about what is important to you and your date. Next, Encourage each other to summarize the year so you can cover major personal milestones in a short time.

And next up is 2016 – talk about resolutions and goals. This could see if you guys are in sync for the coming year. Beyond the typical ones to save more money or lose weight, try to be more adventurous in suggesting to try something new i.e. cooking class, modern dance circle, etc . This could lead to a next date doing exactly that.

 

It is definitely a good idea to ask someone out or accept a date. If things work out, this time of the year will always be special for you both. Though if it ends up otherwise, you can always chock it up to 2015 and move on. With only a short time to the end, try some new beginnings to make 2016 much more to look forward to.

Hard Rock Cafe – MeetDrinks venue review

Nestled near Orchard Road, The Hard Rock Cafe lived up to its namesake as I entered the cafe. The merchandise shop adorned with the brand’s iconic memorophilia worked along with the decor and venue for greater immersion. I found myself humming along to classic, familiar tunes as I was showed to my seat, soaking in the vibe.

“You should get the Hurricane and beef fajitas.” Recommended marketing manager, Natalie Wee, for a first date at Hard Rock with Meet Drinks.

 

 

The beef fajitas were served to me medium rare on a hot sizzling plate, surrounded with sauteed bellpepper and sliced, slow cooked onions. The meat was beautifully seared to a hearty brown on the outside culminating in the rich redness in the center that would bring delight to a beef lover.

 

The accompaniments laid neatly to whet the palette further with a good mix of complementary textures and flavours to the meat.

 

The Freshly made pico de gallo and thick guacamole, the sour cream along with the mixed grated cheddar and jack cheese were waiting to be put together with four baked tortilla wraps.

 

The Hurricane is a Hard Rock Cafe signature cocktail. Built in layers from the bottom of the glass, starting with a single shot of Bacardi rum, mixed in with pineapple, mango and orange juices to add a dash of fruity sweetness. Grenadine syrup and Ameretto liqueur, to finish off in a 16 oz serving.

 

The food and drink was rich in flavour and hearty in portions. I stayed a little longer after I was done, enjoying the music. It felt like Elvis never left the building.

 

Start looking for better matches for better times at the Hard Rock Cafe with the MeetDrinks app. Also, by flashing the app – you can get 10% off merchandise, food and drink bill!

 

Ingredients:

 

Beef fajitas

 

– succulent beef slices done medium rare with onions and bellpepper sauteed on a sizzling plate

 

– Big fat lime wedge

 

– freshly made pico de gallo for greater texture and chunks

 

– fine grated jack and cheddar cheese

 

– guacamole, lettuce, generous sour cream (4oz)

 

– 4 freshly baked tortilla wraps

 

Hurricane (hard rock signature drink)

 

A built cocktail, mixed to be enjoyed by the drinker, from bottom up

 

– 16 Oz cocktail

 

– A single shot bacardi rum

 

– 3 juices pineapple, mango and orange

 

– grenadine syrup

 

– half a shot of Amarato

 

– one shot Cruzan dark rum

 

– garnished orange and cherry

 

Use MeetDrinks to meet someone new today for a drink at Hard Rock Cafe – located at 50 Cuscaden Rd, #02/03-01, HPL House, S249724

 

Drinking Etiquette on First Dates

Is there one? While there doesn’t appear to be any hard and fast rules—drinking etiquette is a popular topic. It’s not surprising, first date impressions can be swayed by your drink order, how you drink and how you talk about drinking. That said, here are some guidelines for how to make a positive first impression, at least when it comes to drinking!

Let’s start off with how you drink. It depends on the other person. Your date seems ready for a wild night ahead? Feel free to take a shot or two to get the night started. Your date seems reserved? Start with a beer or a glass of wine to warm up. If your date is going well—then keep the drinks flowing (in moderation). But be aware of when you are close to reaching your limit. Alcohol tolerance is different for everyone and difficult to quantify. If you are to the point of incoherence and are nauseous, you probably should have called it quits a while ago.

How you talk about drinking is just as important. For all of you alcohol connoisseurs out there … don’t be snobs. Share your knowledge, enlighten your dates—a great icebreaker—but don’t belittle them if they aren’t well versed in the drinking space. For all of you heavy drinkers out there, try to steer conversation clear of your heavy drinking adventures, especially if your date doesn’t appear to be an avid drinker.

Lastly, your drink order. My advice: order your drink of choice. Remain confident with your decision. If your date scolds you—then it’s not meant to be. Sure, it’s okay to have different tastes—you might gravitate towards bourbon, while your date only touches the clear liquors—but be supportive. That aside, it’s important to gauge the venue at hand prior to ordering. If the venue appears to be crowded, keep your order simple to avoid a long delay in receiving your drink. After all, a drink in hand makes conversation that much easier. If the venue is known for its mixology, then don’t think twice about your order!

Statistically, which should I choose – Traditional or Online dating?

From years past till very recently, the only way to meet someone new is to go out and interact with others face-to-face. It could be at work, school, on public transport or at a cafe/bar that your eyes meet that of another and sparks fly. Though, your options seem rather limited to only those around you.

In the modern Internet age, online dating is very common. It is easy to find long lists of singles on a plethora of dating sites and romance could be just one click away. While that may be true, how many people actually make a real connection that started online?

So here are some common predicaments that singles fall into. Based on statistics, it may be easier to decide which to choose for their love lives.

Looking for friendship

With more liberal mindsets in modernized cities, people are taking to meeting new people/strangers online very well. It is no longer taboo to admit that your extended social circle does not yield a single dateable candidate.

In the US, with 54 million singles, there are 49 million of them who have tried out online dating – that’s 90%. It is easy to find dates – without leaving your room or your work cubicle. No wonder everyone is on it.

Though 10% of them will leave permanently in just under 3 months from a combination of frustration and disappointment. You may know everything from someone’s profile but more often than not, you’ll never know enough, which prevents it from being anything but a short affair.

Looking for committed relationships

Sometimes people have had enough with flings, it is time for something steady. Someone to go to the farmer’s market with, a date for the holidays or just to cozy up with in front of a fire. 80% of committed relationships start from traditional offline dates. Unfortunately, that means only 20% of online dates turn out to be lasting ones.

While the numbers are overwhelming, it is not hopeless. With online dates, swiping right more often just means more options. Since there is still no formula for finding a right guy or girl, there could still be a diamond in the rough waiting for you.

Looking for marriage

Some people just want to get hitched. It could be a young idealist who dreams of church bells or perhaps a seasoned bachelor/bachelorette who wants to settle down. A few pertinent numbers to consider – the average length of courtship that lead to marriage for meeting online is 18 months. While for offline meets, it is significantly longer at 42 months.

The key takeaway here is that online dates move way faster to the altar. With plenty of your details already available online, you can skip through the awkward introduction, career track, list of hobbies and other small talk.

That is not to say that the slower track of offline traditional meets means it is a waste of time. Small talk is essential to know if there is enough connection to keep each other engaged. There is a reason why 83% of all marriage still start the traditional way.

So which is it?

Men lie, women lie, numbers don’t. So for those seeking the fast lane, it is online. For those on the scenic route, it is traditional. But there is so much good that can be gained from using online dating and clearly there are benefits in traditional offline meets.

The better solution is to integrate both segments of dating into your life. Online dates are great for picking out common interests (64% thinks that is most important) and physical characteristics (49% says this is). This then narrows down the shortlist of ideal candidates who you could hang out together and be attractive enough to look at.

Request to meet in person with these contenders. Beyond what you already know, 30% of people believe personality is the key on first dates. After the first date, you would have accessed whether the date/s are what you are looking for. Then, the only hope is that these dates feel the same way about you – after all, 53% of people are dating more than one simultaneously.

There are plenty of studies and opinions on whether traditional or online dating is better. This hotly debated topic shows that there isn’t a one-size-fits-all approach to finding a love life. Maybe try out a geo-social dating app. Some times it is better with traditional methods while the online approach may be easier. In the end love is a gamble, so it is time to play the odds.

What happens once the honeymoon phase is over?

As a matchmaker, I hear about your desire to meet the love of your life and about your dreams of living the life you want to live with that exceptional person you want to share special moments with.  At MeetDrinks we are passionate about helping people find love and we realize that we are a short cut to finding your Absolute Match. Life is short, so why wait any longer.

I’m quite confident that in a past or even current relationship your instincts have told you that you were not with the right person but fought it. You fought it with activities and projects that brought you closer together. Or so you thought.  For example, traveling to Europe and enjoying fine dining, love making and creating memories, joining a salsa class and discovering a new level of passion, moving in together to avoid unnecessary traveling and even saving money to buy a dream house? Some people even figure that walking down the isle is the unequivocal solution to their rocky relationship.

You were born intuitive so why not listen to yourself in decision making especially when it comes to your relationships be it with friends or a significant other.

So the questions is: how do you know who is right for you? Who has not heard about the honeymoon phase, the exhilarating phase of discovery and passion? But what happens after, when a person’s true colors starts to show?

You may think that you are above that entire phase, that you are who you say you are. You may have told a man: What you see is what you get and that you don’t pretend to be someone else to impress. Well, most of us don’t try to create a world around ourselves that we cannot sustain but sometimes we can’t help ourselves to do a little more and dress a little better and clean a little more often because we feel inspired to do so, because the person we met is so wonderful that we want to be the best that we can be. Other times, it’s the other person who creates the illusion for us and get this, it’s normal. The honeymoon phase isn’t only about how two people present each other. It is also about what you may perceive about your man and how he may perceive you. The brain plays tricks on you and is very quick to fill in gaps: Oh, I thought he was generous. I thought he was a family person. I thought he was a good communicator, I would have never guessed he had an addiction or that he was controlling or even frugal with his money. Those revelations don’t appear on day one.

What does it mean exactly to find out about your partner’s peculiarities and habits and why do we feel as though they were hidden from us and how can we avoid disappointments?

Some of the famous idiosyncrasies that you may come face to face with include: The toilet seat that is never put back up, the smelly socks that don’t make it to the hamper, the wet floor after the shower, the bed that never gets made, the dishes that don’t get washed and the list goes on. You most likely bring a set of your own quirks and bad habits that he will have to deal with as well. It is very important to understand how men and women present themselves at the beginning of a relationship and that the passion or infatuation are normal and will not last forever.

Once the sparks fade, it’s time for the man and woman to decide if they share similar beliefs, values, goals and interests and if they want to bring the commitment they have for one another to the next level. The infatuation is replaced by solid profound feelings and don’t worry, many sparks come along with those as well.

Compatibility vs Chemistry

As a matchmaker, I am continuously explaining the difference between “compatibility” and “chemistry” to my clients. Although they both start with the letter “C” and end with the letter “Y,” they are diametrically opposed and should not be mistaken for one another. Gentlemen can be smitten by a woman’s beauty and sex appeal. Women may be wowed and feel they have experienced love at first sight. Some say they have never experienced such a feeling but others tell me they have been experienced this exhilarating feeling many times and wish to break the cycle indefinitely without having to compromise on looks and overall physical attraction.

MeetDrinks Success Tip #1: Beware of fireworks: they will not be enough if what you ultimately seek is a long-term relationship or marriage.

Some of my clients share with me that they are tired of dating the wrong people. In my practice, I screen men and women for, among many other qualities, sincerity. I also look for core values and compatibility factors that will give a relationship a strong foundation for growth. So, during a matchmaking consultation, two of the questions I typically ask are the following: What are your relationship goals? What do you look for in a partner?  We will create a list of your Absolute Match Criteria (including core values, character traits, lifestyle, children, habits, revenue, education, traditions and faith) and a list of Absolute Negotiable Match Criteria. By the time we get to the physical aspects, the same thing will be done: you will be asked for your Absolute Physical Attributes and Negotiable Physical Attributes. We should be able to end up with a pretty thorough list of compatibility factors and “mother nature,” chemistry-related attributes that will arouse you sexually.

To help bridge singles over the festive period, MeetDrinks launches iOS and Android app

MeetDrinks, now available on Android and iOS

For immediate release – Singapore, 24/12/14 – With the festive season soon to be in full swing, eligible singles can get straight to the point of dating – to meet and have drinks. Aptly named for the exact purpose, MeetDrinks is a social meet-up application that brings like-minded people closer together over a mutual appreciation for drinks and conversations.

To coincide with the merry-making season, MeetDrinks has released its iOS and Android app. With a slogan of “Better Matches, Better Times”, MeetDrinks promises to match compatible urbanites in the same area on a first date.

“The holidays is the best time to meet new people as everyone is winding down and in a happy mood, ” says John Fearon, co-founder of MeetDrinks. “By removing the chatter of other dating apps and focusing on people meeting up, we will bridge people closer over Christmas and the New Year period.”

Here’s how MeetDrinks works. First, enter a profile to indicate preferences and interests. Second, take a selfie (no uploaded pictures) for easy recognition. Third, state your general location to narrow down the search.

Then the app will allow you to choose from a list of people with similar tastes in your area. When one counterpart agrees, both will be directed to a venue to meet for drinks at mutually convenient time.

To help break the ice and confirm a reservation, you will pre-order drinks in-app. One or both parties can buy drink credits – starting from as low as $10SGD. After that, show up to meet your match.

The app is perfect for Professionals, Managers and Executives who have everything – except time to waste. Meeting new people who are in sync with their schedules and interests will be high on their priorities list.

To enhance the experience, MeetDrinks has signed up interesting and conducive venues for dates. Users will be directed to quaint locales with unique atmospheres to be in the mood. With an extensive list of bars, restaurants, clubs, cafes and more – meeting new people has never been simpler. Also, participating venues will see increased crowd, expenditure and especially so on quiet shifts.

“Online dating is a global opportunity and our niche of offering ‘Better Matches, Better Times’ will appeal to venues and customers everywhere,” says Fearon. “We currently have people on the ground in Shanghai, Singapore, Bangkok & London.”

To get the good times rolling, users can signup now to get $2.50 SGD towards their first drink. After that, they can create and forward an unique URL to invite friends to try MeetDrinks – for every signup, they will get an additional $2.50 SGD.

For more information on the perks of MeetDrinks, please visit:

http://www.meetdrinks.com

Venues who are keen to partner up can email:

partners@meetdrinks.com

Additional information:

MeetDrinks is part of JF2

JF2 (pronounced J-F-Squared) is an early stage startup studio that nurtures greenfield ideas to change the world. Unlike traditional accelerators or incubators, it will unearth great startups from the idea stage, provide seed funding, help organic growth, and lead to a flourishing exit.

www.jf2.co